In the Before Times of February 2020, when the world was as it was before The Big Rupture And Rest, I felt the call. Waking the Wild Feminine with Lian Brook-Tyler stirred something within me. I harboured misgivings, of course. The thought of an intimate women’s circle (with all that nourishing going on) was vaguely repellant to me. And still I answered the call.

Something wiser than me understood it was time to wake up. Time to fall to the ground and dig in the dirt. Time to seek out the lost pieces of gold in the darkness. I never really saw the strength in shadow. I thought that shadows, being shadows, were passing figments of my imagination. They were gloomy phases to be feared, braced and weathered, until the sun returned to my body and mind. I didn’t know there was magic to be found there, if only I’d had the courage to look. A few moons later, with sisters in digital square circle as witness, I made a commitment to living sovereign and soulfree.

Months afterwards, I almost strayed from this tenderfoot path. My head was turned by the formal, structured, traditional, trodden ways. The ways that end with recognised letters after your name. Where you become an expert in other people’s already-made ideas. The pull was strong. My mind weighed up the pros and cons and came up with a way to bend me to fit the box. It almost worked.

Until I remembered my vow. I realised that unless I am willing to get down on my knees, digging for old bones. Unless I am devoted to hunting for dark treasures. Unless I am willing to walk the wildish path—the natural, unconfined, sensing, feeling, intuiting, embodying, spiralic, intuitive, rhythmic, feminine path. Unless I am willing to do all this, then meet with my sisters in a clearing in the wood. Unless I walk this path back to me, hand-in-hand with my lost sister selves, my life will never change. And I will have nothing of lasting value to offer the world.

Angela’s Flashes is a container for exploring this off-beat path and sharing the discoveries of this mid-life rewilding. It is a space to honour the timings of my life and this process of becoming. To retrace the threads that connect the untamed, bushy-maned girl I was in the picture at the top of this page, to the woman I am unearthing now. All of you is welcome to journey home to the wild with me.